Be True To You

Do you show up as your authentic self, no matter what?  

This is one sure way to make your life easier, happier, and more fulfilling. 

I decided a long time ago – after lots of missteps as a child and teenager – that being honest was the easiest way to be in life.  This was a not a high moral ground decision for me back then, as much as it was just easy.  If you tell someone something that isn’t true, then you have to remember what story you told to whom.  Yes, it’s that simple.  It’s too complicated to remember that stuff, so it’s just easier to tell the truth.  Sometimes, that truth seems inconvenient – like when it’s going to upset you or someone else, but in the long run, it will pay off.  Do I practice this perfectly?  Of course not.  But the longer I practice, the easier it gets.  Now, I sometimes have a difficult time keeping a secret to help with a surprise.  Let’s just hope the person who will be receiving that surprise does NOT directly ask me🙂!

Let’s say you’re looking for a new job.  You’re being interviewed as a top candidate, and you’re asked a question.  Your true answer is one that you KNOW will cost you that job, if you choose to be honest.  You have a decision to make, and it’s bigger than it appears on the surface.  You can give the answer you think they want to hear, and you may even get the job.  Then, you can pretend to be someone you’re not as long as you’re in that role.  Or, you can tell your truth.  You believe you won’t get the job.  That may seem like a bummer, but you get to keep being you, and the job that is the right one for you is going to come later.  What do you do?  I can tell you that this happened to me when I was a young, pregnant mother who NEEDED that job.  I answered truthfully.  Not just once, but at least three times in the course of the interview.  I KNEW I wouldn’t get the job.  Guess what.  Yep, they appreciated my honesty and wanted me anyway.  Interestingly enough, I didn’t take it, and the very next day, I received an offer for a position that was much more in alignment with my skills, capabilities, and values at that time.  That isn’t always how it works out, but it does happen.

As I got older, I found The Four Agreements – the really amazing book by Don Miguel Ruiz found me.  The very first agreement is to be impeccable with your word.  That grabbed my attention, and is at turns out, the honesty I thought was just the simplest way to be, was actually one of my core values.  Who knew🙂?  Being impeccable with your word is more than just being honest, though.  It’s about doing what you say you’re going to do.  It’s about valuing your gifts and the gifts of others, and more.  If you still haven’t read this life-changing book, DO IT NOW!

Now, let’s go a bit deeper.  Who are you hurting, if you choose not to show up as your most authentic self, the real you?  There may be some consequences for the people around you, but the biggest victim of you choosing to pretend you are someone you are not, is….you.  You are a person with a unique set of beliefs and sacred gifts, and if you choose not to share those with others, they will never be shared.  We are all connected, and you have a divine part to play.  So, PLAY it!

I believe that being true to yourself is the definition of self-care.  Whatever is true to you will nourish you.  We serve others –loved ones, complete strangers, and the global community – out of our overflow.  If we don’t care for and nourish ourselves, we will have nothing left to give others.  So, self-care is not only about being true to ourselves, it’s about replenishing the energy we use in caring for others.

But, being true to yourself is even deeper than being impeccable with your word and taking care of yourself, so you can take care of others.  Being true to yourself means LIVING in alignment with the truth of who you are.  This means knowing who you are, what your values are right now, and literally doing nothing that is out of alignment with your core.  It is so important to continually practice self-study and get to know yourself in the present moment, because contrary to popular belief, your values do actually change over time.  In fact, YOU change over time.  Remember that change is the only constant.  What’s really happening is that as you begin to know more about yourself, you get closer to your highest most authentic self.  So, yes, you are changing, but you are becoming that infinite part of you, the part of you that doesn’t change…your soul.  You are an infinite being, currently having a human experience. 

What are you doing to continue getting to know yourself?  It requires stillness, so find the tools and practices that help you get still and listen to your inner wisdom.  They are unique to you, so if you try something that doesn’t feel right, there are tons of options to try.  The possibilities are endless.